Marrakech – There I was, at 7 a.m., in bed, clutching my phone like it was a warm cup of coffee — only instead of a cozy scroll through memes, I was being yelled at by a perky virtual trainer named “Coach Sam.”

“Let’s MOVE!” he chirped. Move? I was barely breathing.

Welcome to the golden age of fitness apps — where a digital stranger tells you to do burpees before you’ve even had your first sip of coffee.

Somewhere between the pandemic, the rise of athleisure as actual fashion, and our collective obsession with “wellness,” fitness apps slipped into our lives faster than you can say downward dog.

From meditation reminders to full-blown marathon training plans, there’s literally an app that will cheer you on, guilt-trip you, and track your every squat, plank, and protein shake.

And I have downloaded all of them. Twice.

But here’s the thing nobody really tells you: as much as these apps promise to be your personal coach, accountability partner, and hype squad, sometimes they feel more like that friend who means well but makes you feel bad when you cancel brunch plans. Again.

Sure, it’s empowering to have a sleek little icon on your phone promising “a new you.”

It’s also mildly terrifying when you realize the app knows more about your weekly step count than your actual best friend does.

And yet… there’s a kind of magic in it too. One minute you’re a half-asleep human burrito wrapped in your comforter; the next, you’re doing a 15-minute HIIT workout in your living room like you’re auditioning for a Nike ad.

You don’t even need a fancy gym membership anymore — just a good sports bra and a stubborn refusal to let your Apple Watch shame you with another “no activity today” notification.

The real secret no app can sell you? Motivation isn’t something you download.

It’s messy, it’s personal, and it rarely looks like the glossy before-and-after photos we’re bombarded with. Some days you’ll smash a workout and feel invincible.

Other days, your biggest accomplishment will be opening the app… and then taking a nap instead.

And you know what? Both days count.

At the end of the day, fitness apps are like exes: some were good for the season, some were cautionary tales, but each one taught you something about yourself.

Maybe you really are a yoga-at-home girl. Maybe you love boxing but hate spinning.

Maybe you just need a playlist called “Running Away from My Problems” to finally enjoy cardio.

So whether you’re team “daily workout grind” or “still looking for the perfect app,” just remember: your wellness journey doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s. Especially not Coach Sam’s.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I need to tell my Pilates app that I’m “taking a rest day”… again.